easy come, easy go

Lately, I've been having trouble thinking of topics to write about. Usually when I've written in the past, it's because I feel strongly about something. Recently, I guess I haven't really felt strongly about anything. In a way, I think that's good! I think it's progress. And I think that I've just become less stressed and less worried about things. All in all, I think I've just been happy. I haven't really let things bother me much recently, and all the "drama" and emotional stuff that happens just slides right off these days. It doesn't affect me half as much as it used to in the past. Given, I never really had to deal with all that stuff before, and once I did, I didn't know how to handle or react to it!

Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say is that I haven't been writing a lot because I've been busy being happy. Just doing the things that are making me happy and fulfilling those goals I had written about a few posts back.

In fact, once my mindset changed and once I started doing things to make myself happy, I noticed a huge transformation in the people around me as well. I feel almost as good as I used to a couple years ago, only this time, my happiness isn't dependent on another person. Once I established this for myself, it was just as people told me. Things started to fall into place, and just when I least expected it, I met someone who has potential to be more than just a someone. If I met this person a year ago, I'd probably be crazy excited and giddy over him waiting for the minute he calls or writes. But after everything I've been through, after all the hurt, and the waiting, and the tears, I know to read the "PROCEED WITH CAUTION" sign and test the dangerous waters before I jump in head first. And let's be honest. We all know I've been known to nose-dive into some pretty shallow pools. Just imagine the head trauma I've had to go through! Maybe it's timing? Actually, a lot of it is probably timing. But if you were one of the hundreds that told me everything happens for a reason, I think I've just found my reason. My reason for going through what I did in the last two years and everything else. The difference now, though, is that if it doesn't work out, I know I'm going to be just fine afterwards. This mindset, this tiny change in thinking, surprisingly plays a huge difference. It's liberating, and it's reassuring. And in some strange way, it's comforting.

Whatever happens will happen. In any case, I'm in a good place, and I can't wait to see what's in store for me. I promise I will write again soon.